How to Write Wedding Vows That Sound Like You
Writing your wedding vows shouldn’t feel like a stressful homework assignment. There’s no perfect formula, no rigid structure—just an opportunity to speak from the heart and express what your partner truly means to you. Your vows are about capturing the heart of your relationship, not impressing a literary panel or trying to sound like a poet (unless that’s your thing!).
Think of your vows as a love letter spoken out loud, filled with the moments, emotions, and promises that define your partnership. They don’t need to be overly dramatic or filled with fancy words—they just need to be real. Whether you want to keep your vows short and sweet, add a touch of humor, or weave in meaningful traditions, this guide will help you craft personalized wedding vows that feel authentic, heartfelt, and totally you.
If you’re feeling stuck or don’t know where to start, don’t worry—you’re not alone! This guide will walk you through how to write wedding vows, including tips for structuring them, brainstorming ideas, and delivering them with confidence on your big day. Whether you’re looking for funny wedding vows, romantic wedding vows, or unique wedding vows, we’ve got you covered.
Why Personalized Wedding Vows Matter
Writing your own vows gives you the chance to:
✔ Express your love in a way that feels natural and meaningful
✔ Make your ceremony more personal and unique
✔ Create a lasting memory for you and your partner
✔ Set the tone for your marriage with heartfelt promises
Keep It Short and Sweet
Your love story is epic, but your vows don’t need to be a full-length novel. Aim for under three minutes when spoken aloud—trust me, that’s plenty of time to make an impact without losing everyone’s attention (or your breath).
✔ Highlight one or two meaningful moments instead of trying to summarize your entire relationship. A single heartfelt story can say more than a timeline of events ever could.
✔ Practice out loud. What sounds good in your head might feel way too long when spoken.
Ditch the Phone—Seriously
Holding your vows on your phone might seem convenient, but doesn’t photograph well. Plus, tech glitches are not the kind of wedding surprise you want.
✔ Write or print your vows on a keepsake you can treasure—whether that’s a vow book, a letter, or even a special card. It makes the moment feel more intentional and romantic.
Let Your Personality Shine
Your vows should sound like you. Whether that means heartfelt, hilarious, poetic, or a mix of everything—own your voice.
✔ Love a good pun? Drop one in.
✔ Have a favorite movie or song lyric that fits your relationship? Use it! Just give credit where it’s due.
✔ Inside jokes? Absolutely. Your vows are for your person, so make them personal.
Bottom line? Don’t force a style that isn’t yours. The best vows are the ones that feel natural.
Not Sure Where to Start? Here’s How to Get Going
Staring at a blank page can be overwhelming, but don’t worry—you don’t have to reinvent the wheel. If you’re unsure where to begin, start by answering a few simple questions. Think of this as a brainstorming session rather than a pressure-filled writing task.
What do you love most about your partner? Is it their kindness? Their sense of humor? The way they always know exactly what you need without saying a word? Start with the qualities that make them your person.
What moment made you realize you wanted to spend forever with them? Maybe it was a grand romantic gesture, or maybe it was something small—like the way they always save you the last bite of dessert. Sometimes, the tiniest moments carry the most meaning.
What promises do you want to make for your future together? Beyond the big, traditional vows, think about the personal things that make your relationship unique. Will you promise to always kill the spiders? To make them coffee exactly the way they like it? To support their wildest dreams?
How does your partner make you feel?Loved? Safe? Inspired? Like you can take on the world? Tap into the emotions they bring out in you.
Once you’ve answered a few of these, you’ll likely start to see a theme emerge. That’s the foundation of your vows!
Quick Exercise to Get the Words Flowing
Still feeling stuck? Try this simple trick:
Set a timer for 5 minutes and free-write everything that comes to mind about your partner—no editing, no overthinking. Just let the words flow.
What do you love about them?
What do you appreciate?
What do you promise?
Once you’re done, go back and highlight any phrases or ideas that stand out. Those could be the seeds of your vows.
Practice and Deliver Your Vows with Confidence
Writing your vows is one thing, but delivering them in front of your partner and loved ones is another. A little practice goes a long way!
✔ Read your vows out loud multiple times before the wedding. This helps with flow and pacing.
✔ Pause for impact. Don’t rush through emotional or funny moments—let them land.
✔ Write your vows in a format that’s easy to read. Large print, short line breaks, or note cards can make it easier to follow if nerves kick in.
✔ If you get emotional, embrace it! Tears, laughter, and pauses are all part of the moment. Take a deep breath and keep going—your partner will love every word.
Word Bank for Wedding Vows
Need a little extra inspiration? Here’s a list of words and phrases that might spark some ideas:
-
Use these words to describe how your partner makes you feel and what they mean to you:
Adored
Cherished
Beloved
Devoted
Unbreakable
Home
Safe
Comforted
Warm
Grateful
Inspired
Joyful
Whole
Protected
Free
Understood
Accepted
Magnetic
Boundless
Unstoppable
-
Use these phrases to shape the commitments you want to make in your vows:
I vow to always stand by your side.
I promise to love you fiercely, in all seasons of life.
I will be your safe place, your rock, and your greatest cheerleader.
I vow to always listen, even when we don’t agree.
I promise to support your wildest dreams and remind you of your magic.
I will grow with you, learn with you, and build with you.
I vow to celebrate your victories and lift you through your struggles.
I promise to weather every storm hand in hand.
I will show up for you, every single day.
I vow to love you exactly as you are, and as you grow into who you are meant to be.
I will always choose you, in big ways and small ways, every day.
-
Lighthearted ways to personalize your vows and make them uniquely you:
I promise to always let you have the last bite (even when I don’t want to).
I vow to never watch our favorite show without you.
I promise to love you even when you steal the covers.
I vow to remind you how amazing you are, even when you forget.
I promise to make your coffee exactly the way you like it.
I vow to be your partner-in-crime for every adventure.
I promise to always laugh at your jokes, even the bad ones.
I vow to dance with you in the kitchen, no matter how silly we look.
I promise to kill all the spiders (or scream with you if we’re both afraid).
I vow to always split the fries fairly (even if I want more).
I promise to pretend to be interested in your favorite show/hobby/game, even when I have no clue what’s going on.
I vow to keep our love playful, spontaneous, and full of laughter.
Don’t Chase Perfection
There’s no such thing as the “perfect” vows. The best ones come straight from the heart.
✔ Write from the heart—don’t overthink it.
✔ Use traditional vows if they resonate, but don’t feel pressured.
✔ Give yourself time—don’t wait until the night before!
At the end of the day, your vows are a celebration of your love, not a test. Keep them real, keep them you, and you’ll create something unforgettable.
Now go write some vows that’ll make your person melt. ❤️
Need a Little Guidance?
Your vows are one of the most important (and nerve-wracking) parts of your wedding ceremony, but you don’t have to figure them out alone. At Simply Weddings NYC, I’m all about making sure your ceremony feels like you—personal, heartfelt, and full of the magic that makes your love story unique.
Sharing your vows with your officiant isn’t just about logistics—it’s about making sure your words land the way you want them to and feel right for your moment. If you need a little help along the way, I’ve got you!
Still have questions? No stress—just shoot me an email at hello@simplyweddingsnyc.com.
